The Employment Quest:Part 3

Caesars-Jerk It Out It's day 9 of unemployment. Yesterday I made another attempt to send my resume to this bank through this friend applying for a position as a Bank Officer. I know it sounds ambitious but it's contractual. Well if I got it, at least I have a decent temporary job. Better than fooling around like now.

The Employment Quest:Part 2

Razorlight-Somewhere Else It's day 6 of unemployment. I'm still here at my university doing nothing but utilising the free wi-fi facilities provided. Oh wait, it's not really free. I have to pay RM500 annual fee for this. I mean, apart from other facilities like the mediocre library and the obsolete workstation and the medieval unisex toilets. Yes, it's unisex here. Wtf. Just checked out the e-mail. Still, there's no answer for the Instructional Designer position. Shit. I guess I should just stop hoping on it. Damn it.

The Employment Quest:Part 1

It’s day 3 of unemployment. Out of boredom, I bought 2 pirated cds today! I had long wanted to see the award-winning movie ‘Million Dollar Baby’ and since none of my housemates bought it, I got one myself. I know the movie is somewhat cliche right now but due to the hectic life I had before, I hadn't had the time to see it. The other one was ‘The Alternative Album’ which I had never know of its existence. I bought it because there’s Dove’s ‘There Goes The Fear’ which I really want to have in my MP3 collection and few other British Rock band.

‘Million’ was a slow-moving story and I have no idea why it had won many awards. I don’t know whether the movie comes before or after this whole Terri Schiavo cum euthanasia thing but they certainly had some similarities. Wtf. And out of boredom too, I, the honourable jobless graduate, happily listing all the songs in the cd.

22-20's-22 Days Athlete-Shake Those Windows Black Rebel Motorcycle Club-Stop Blur-Out Of Time Coldplay-Clocks Doves-There Goes The Fear Gomez-Silence Graham Coxon-Freakin' Out Green Day-Boulevard Of Broken Dreams Jane's Addiction-Just Because Placebo-English Summer Rain Radiohead-2+2=5 Starsailor-Silence Is Easy Stereogram-Walkie Talkie Man Supergrass-Kiss Of Life The Bees-Horseman The Beta Band-Assessment The Concretes-You Can't Hurry Love The Dandy Warhols-We Used To Be Friends The Music-Freedom Fighter The Vines-Ride

The Pretender

Yes. I did it again. This time with the straight friends I befriended with since 3,4 years ago. We’ve been through together a lot and they have no idea that all this while they’re befriending a gay. They were more like my study friends. We had studied, discussion, you name it, together. Currently they(a couple and a guy) are doing their industrial training and came to see me yesterday during lunch hour. One of them wanted to see me for the weed. So it just happened while they’re having lunch(I already had mine with my fag hag) that he asked me to come to his workplace(a broadcasting company) to see the tv personalities(girls of course) that they work with and it just happened that I mentioned the name of a famous tv personality as if I wanted to see her! I mean, I have to do that just to show some interest when in fact I’m just a lousy queer who just can’t stop looking at this cute mate who came along with them! Yes, they brought along this guy to see me! OK OK back to the real account(but I hope he’s as gay too!). So the conversation went on as straight as they want to and I feel really bad. I feel bad that I had never been honest to them and even if I tell them the truth, I believe it will be catastrophic! I don’t think we’d be stayed as friends this long if I reveal the monster in me. So there I go putting on this strange mask I don’t even understand every time we spend those straight time together. The fact that I lied to them for all this while is hurting me in and out. I would regret it every time I think about it before I sleep and would cry if I’m sure nobody’s looking. I only come out to certain individual whom I believe would have no problem accepting people like me and who wouldn’t scrutinise me for what I am. Honestly, I hate pretending to be someone else, someone I didn’t know, someone I didn’t understand but with this kind of environment I can only hope that I’d live in a place where everyone is equally treated regardless of their sexuality…

The Fag Hag

If I’m not mistaken, I had never write anything about this great friend of mine before but I just want to give a brief intro on her. So today we had lunch together before I met with those straight bunch and it’s all on her because I saved her arse, again. She already had a decent job as a BDE with the same company where she did her industrial training(lucky devil!). But she had no idea I had a blog, I mean, I have yet to tell her.

OK, I have been out of the closet and revealing all those ugly skeletons I had to her ever since we knew each other during our freshman years. Well at first it was really difficult but I was inspired to do that from the numerous come-out stories I read and after I’m bloody sure that she’d not ostracised me and she was like “ Yeah, I kind of knew it all this while, I just” and I was damn relieved and embarrassed. Relieved because I don’t have to explain her what it’s all about and embarrassed because I should have told her earlier! And from that moment she officially become my fag hag! And for this I thank to the man above for letting me to be true to the person I trust most.

The Free Man!

At last! I made it! Yes I made it! I'm a free man! Sent the final report of my project paper today. I'm unofficially an IT graduate! 'unofficially' till the much-speculated convo this coming September. After 5, well almost 6 years of ups and downs I finally reached the line! Can't wait to see those pig faces. I still remember when one of them told me that he'll finished first but hey hog! I made it first! I don't mean to sound arrogant here but they made me to! Now it's time for me to get a decent job. Is there any out there? Well, with the 80,000 unemployed graduates out there, I doubt it. I'm unofficially unemployed graduate number 80,001!

The Presentation!

Athlete-Half Light Damn it! damn it! damn it! I was bombarded, humiliated! Well at least that's what i felt. Went through the last shit today and I really have no idea whether to cheer or to fear. To cheer because I've gone through the final shit and to fear of failing the subject! I don't know. The moderator was tough on me. He's not supposed to be my mod but due to some technical mistake explained earlier by my supposedly-to-be mod (they accidently changed my final draft with each other!) I have no choice. I was asked to change my words in the documentation into simpler ones. He told me that academic thesis shouldn't use such bombastic vocabs. Loud and clear that everyone in the room could hear it! I mean, he's also my mod for the previous project and he okayed the contents(the so called bombastically-vocab-laden thesis) so I don't get it. Wtf. And I was also told that my system hadn't reach the right level. No heart feelings. I knew it long before. Not even hurt cos it was meant to be that way. At least I did the system myself. Well, 70-80% of it. Better than other people who buy their systems and presented it as if it's their own works!

The Reds Won The Match!

Liverpool won! my Liverpool! Honestly, I was a little bit skeptic few days before the match but continued with my egocentric statement each time I was asked that this fantastic team will make it. The fast-pace approach in the first half suddenly lifted my trust on my own words(and the team). I'm just going to give few details here. At minute 10 and 25, the splendid Hyppia and the fabulous Garcia scored a goal respectively. Baros almost make the third goal with a shot that was deflected by Cannavaro. Then the thrilling moment came during the second period when their performance begin to deteriorate(always). They had difficulties to keep the ball due to the sudden harsh movement from the rival side. Anyone would have predicted this. At minute sixty-four, Cannavaro managed to squirm past Carson's post. The match was finally ended with a deep breath. Liverpool 2, Juventus 1.