maybe it's just me...

The Dream

2008-08-07T18:48:00.024+08:00

I was dead again.

Last night.

This time, I was shot a multiple shot with a machine-gun like weapon.

I was in a death row. Literally. We were shot one by one and I knew no one in the row. And I didn't even know why was I shot, what did I do to deserve it.

When my turn arrived, I managed to profess my faith (Shahada) before they started to shoot me mercilessly in the chest. I can feel the pain and I can feel my soul being pulled out of my body.

I thought it was real.

I had no regrets even if it's real.

I'm not ready but I don't mind. I just don't mind. Well, what can you do if it's your turn to go?

When I woke up, the morning sun was shining on my face. I looked around me. It's the same messy bedroom, wall painted with cheap paint, shoes in front of the telly.

"Oh, it was just a dream!" I told myself.

Then I moved on.

The Regrets

2008-08-01T04:52:00.011+08:00

I couldn't really recall how many time I had to say. "Sorry, I don't do girls" but I've been saying it quite often lately.

On a beautiful island in the north-eastern coast of Malaysia (Well, Perhentian Kecil Island to be exact...):

Damsel in distress: You have chest hair! I want to touch!*Upon seeing me topless*

Mate in distress: Sorry, not for girls!

Damsel in distress: You'll never know until you try...

Mate in distress: Sorry, I don't do girls.

And she even said that if my parents ask me to settle down, I can marry her! Ahahaha! Funny.

Last night at a birthday party:

The paper-bag Princess: Oh really? He's just like Sam? *Asking for assurance from another friend and referring to a gay friend for my sexuality*

Another friend: Yes dear, he's just like Sam. You think he's straight?

Mate: Lol *when the conversation overheard by me* Sorry, I don't do girls! But you're safe with me! Hehehe.

It's seems like girls are quite fond of me eh?

Wek. I'm cursed.

The Habits

2008-07-25T23:58:00.020+08:00

Working with people of different nationalities has really broaden my horizon. Apart from their languages and cultures, some have 'deviating' potty practice. Like leaving behind their pubic hairs on the lid. I know I've seen a lot of this before in public toilets across the country but this unbecoming 'ritual' has somewhat becomes a common trait of the people from this particular country. It's unbecoming because they are all professionals. Call me ethnocentric or brand me anything you like but I'm just telling the truth. What do you feel upon stepping inside the toilet, there are pubic hairs neatly placed on the lid? And this happened each time you go in after 'they' used the toilet. I don't understand why they leave behind pubic hairs for the world to see. And to make matters worst, they sometimes leave behind 'spots'. Spots of faeces ladies and gentlemen.

Am I missing a new trend here or have I started hallucinating? I only have one word for them: despicablemotherfuckers.

And people throwing rubbish out from their cars really get my nerves. Good friends of mine dare not throw their rubbish out if I'm present in the car since I'll tell them to pick them up, which of course they don't, but enough for them to behave when I'm around.

And I'm not ashame to say that PJ is DIRTY. Shame on you PJites! The lack of rubbish bins around were one of the reasons why PJ is in this state right now. I thought things are going to change with the new state government. Well, apart from the first 20 cubic meters free water, other things remain the same. Rubbish left unattended. Dried leaves on the roadside left uncollected. So much for a good governance. Plastics and other rubbish were thrown by people randomly. I don't think all PJites are unclean. But some of them are just plain ignorant. Be it locals or immigrants. I say apart of penalising people who park their cars haphazardly, fine those who litter too!

Last night, while on the monorail ride home from seeing my good friend, I was really surprised and angry at this local lady who rushed into the monorail and pushing aside a blind lady in front of her. I was about to help the blind lady into the train but a foreign lady who was closer to her immediately helped to get her inside upon seeing her with the stick.

What kind of animals are we surrounded by nowadays?

Where have all the good values gone?

The French

2008-06-29T18:35:00.013+08:00

Oh.

There was this other 'incident' aboard the train. It happened while my friend and I were on our way home.

As we stepped inside, there were three Caucasians, two birds and a bloke standing around the grab bars in the middle of the train. The train was packed like canned-sardines as it was peak hour. I stood opposite them while my friend stood next to me. We chatted like always and the three Caucasians chatted in English between them too.

One of the bird was quite close to me. And out of the blue, suddenly, I heard she mumbles "Voulez vous coucher avec moi ce soir" a few times, while looking at me. I heard of this phrase before but I have no idea what it meant. I HATE the song actually. I ignored her and thinking about getting home as soon as possible, as I was so tired.

Back at home, I suddenly remembered the event and my curiosity conjured me to google the phrase and tadaaaa...

"Do you want to sleep with me tonight?"

Yes. That's what it means and I didn't know it!

Goodness.Gracious.Me.

I wish it was the bloke who said that to me! He's bloody hot! Well, even if he said that to me, I'd have ignored him like I did to one of his girlfriends. Because me no speak French!

Now I remember, no wonder the other bird gave a subtle smile when her friend mumbles this to me!

I was harassed by a bird again!

Why is it always birds? I'm cursed eh? :(

P/S: Anyone willing to teach me French? :)

The Changes

2008-06-09T18:23:00.010+08:00

Much has been said about the recent fuel prices hike. I don't have to aggravate. But what tickles my bones is when the government calls the people to change their lifestyles. It seems like The Circus is in town again and The Jester is getting funnier!

And they have the guts to say that the Consumer Price Index (CPI) won't be affected by this latest development. Who are you kidding mates?

Apa lu cakap ni celaka? Domino effect memang inevitable la buffalo. Lu jangan sampai gua cakap bahasa. Gua beli fresh milk itu hari, on the first day of the price hike itself dah naik 70 cents and became RM4.59 a carton! Apehal? And that's the cheapest fresh milk. Habis kalu lepas ni gua kena la cari susu cap gantong dow. Kate ubah lifetstyle. Lanciao!

The Tantrum

2008-05-21T18:17:00.011+08:00

I'm always full of rage. I wasn't aware of this until some people called me 'garang'(fierce) few times. It's only then I know that often, certain gestures and words from me were construed as fiercy.

A good friend told me before, that if I were to be a lecturer or teacher, my students would be really afraid of me. Even a tiny mistake would deserve a spank. Some might even begging for more.

There was this time I told my friends that I called up Astro customer services.

Clawed-red-eyed hideous monster: I.want.my.subtitles.back.

Sweet-lollipop-condensed-milk Agent: The subtitle is there Sir.

Clawed-red-eyed hideous monster: The.English.subtitles. I want it back. It was there before but suddenly vanished. Poof. Gone into the air. Volatile. Smooching with the angels up there I believe.

Sweet-lollipop-condensed-milk Agent: *Shivering* Hold on Sir. Let me check it out for you.

At this point, I think the poor agent went to the nearest TV to check the subtitle.

Sweet-lollipop-condensed-milk Agent: There's no English subtitle for that program Sir, only Bahasa subtitles.

Clawed-red-eyed hideous monster: That's what I've been telling you earlier. The English subtitle wasn't there anymore. It WAS there before.

He keeps telling me there was never English subtitle and of course I keep telling him what I saw and believed. If it's not English subtitles I saw before, then what was it? Hebrew? You telling me I'm schizophrenic now? Well of course I didn't tell him this. I'm not that sarcastic! Yeah right...

Until he said,

Sweet-lollipop-condensed-milk Agent: I think I better check with the technical people and ask them to get the subtitles back for you.

Clawed-red-eyed hideous monster: When will I get my subtitles back?

Sweet-lollipop-condensed-milk Agent: In half-an-hour time Sir.

Well of course I know it's just a bloody fake pacifying assurance but I don't want to waste my time being an arse making him cry and shit in his pants in front of his colleagues. I've already missed some parts of the program while making this call and it will be over in less than half-an-hour. I bet if I were to make another call and requested to talk to the same agent, they might have said he's gone to Rwanda for good. So much I don't want to let him off the hook, I don't want to miss the program and having to wait for the repeat either. I just hate to wait. I let him off. He's doing fine now I believe.

And to my despair, my friends called me 'garang' for this.

I mean, come on, I paid my bill every month and I deserve services worth every cent I spent. I'm sure everyone agree on this.

What's the point of spending your money on shoddy services?

Well sometimes, people need to be 'garang' to get what they deserved.

But I never got my bloody subtitles back!

The Dreams

2008-05-13T22:11:00.005+08:00

Oh my god. I had two weird dreams last night. I think I tend to have weird dreams when I'm not feeling well.

It's unusual though that I can recall them.

The first one was a reptile affair. I managed to get a chameleon as an addition to my iguana! And it was a fat one! Hehe. It tried to run away at first but I managed to get hold of it and calmed it down.

The second one was more like a national affair. I was in the parliament house and I witnessed a number of the ruling party's MPs standing up, stepping on the desk and crossing over to the other side. I saw Rafidah but she just sit and looking at what is going on that time. Suddenly, Dr Mashitah was standing on my left. I asked her who's her researcher. She told me it's someone from her university and left me upset.

I believe the first one occurred because of my excitement to get one more reptile for myself. Not a chameleon though.

The second dream occurred probably because of too much Malaysia Today in my daily readings.

And I'm not complaining if it really happen anyway.

The Conundrum

2008-05-11T13:29:00.004+08:00

Oh I've stopped smoking for almost 3 months now. It's not hard to stop when the doctor adviced you to because it's one of the contributing factor of your gastritis.

I fucking hate the recurring pain in my stomach.

So I stop sucking smoke.

This headstrong leftist monster finally heeds the doctor's advice. Cold turkey. Yes people, I literally stopped when she told me,"Adek, you have to stop smoking, drinking". And yes she called me adek.(For the benefit of my 'offshore' readers, adek=little brother). Whatever.

I stopped not because she called me adek. Or because the doctor is a lady, as suggested by one of my officemates who had no qualms asking me when I'm going to get married almost every fucking day. What made her think that I only listen to female doctors? Honestly, I'd heed a doctor's advice no matter what his/her sex or sexual orientation. Even if the doctor is a lingerie sniffer. Or an every-hour wanker.

I mean, what's the point of seeing a doctor if you don't follow his/her advice? I can't deny the urge to have a fag, or two, or hundreds, is still there. It's always there. And will always be. It needs one's high determination and courage as big as, errr... Mount Kinabalu?(a tribute to my long-time Sabahan crush. Hehe).

Some ego helps too.

This is where you can put your ego to good use. For instance, when offered a cig, smile and politely say no(no affiliation whatsoever with the government's campaign however). When insisted(this situation normally occurs with your good friends), smile and politely show your middle fingers. Yes. Fingers. And that's some ego I tell you.

Well hey presto! Instead of the 'Say NO!' campaign, why not 'Show Fingers!' campaign?

How about that for a holistic change?

The Perverts

2008-04-17T14:06:00.004+08:00

As far as I can remember, I've been harassed thrice. Apparently, they have the same modus operandi: tilting their chests either against my scapula or elbow. They probably came from the same club, Bosoms For Boys(BOOBS).

These series of unfortunate events happened on my LRT rides. I bet a straight guy given my position would have savour the moment and end up getting laid each time. But for me, the feeling of having a tender, milk-secreting organ of female mammals against my shoulder blade is atrocious, a deliberate annoyance, downright infuriating.

Maybe some of you might say, "Oh, it's crowded in there, that's why. It's unintended". Alright. Bless you. But when you make a move to distant yourself and your humble effort seems more inviting, I rest my case.

Ladies, when you try to release, to get laid, to express yourself or whatever your mom call it, make sure you get the RIGHT person!

I'm LEFTIST!

The Election

2008-03-10T14:42:00.002+08:00

I just can't restrain myself from talking about the recent General Election result as I'm part of it too. It's my second time casting my votes and the people have spoken! Yehaaa! The people have spoken through the ballot box!

Although I'm a little upset with the result in my hometown which saw that 'weighing gadget' still reign and hanging around, if you know what I mean. Nevertheless, we managed to reduce their majority votes!

And as far as I know, I was the only one in my family who voted for the opposition. My mom even asked me who am I going to vote the night before the historical day. Sorry mom, your sweet son is one hell a defiant person.

In 2004, my votes went to the rocket for the parliamentary seat and to the keris-wielding bigot for the state seat. But this time around, my votes went to the rocket and to the bruised eyes for parliamentary and state seat respectively.

Why the change some of you may ask?

"Something is rotten in the state of Denmark"- Hamlet Act 1, Scene 4, W. Shakespeare.

Enough said.

The Doctor

2008-02-29T12:54:00.010+08:00

Went to the clinic for my unstoppable runny nose and cough. My favourite doctor was in charge that day. I like him not because he's pretty(He's way beyond my father's age anyway), but because he likes to talk. Meaningful talk.

Doctor: Do you smoke?

Mate: Yes.

Doctor: *Checking my throat* How long have you been smoking?

Mate: 8-9 years?

Doctor: Hmmm. 10 years. How many sticks a day?

Mate: 10-14.

Doctor: 14 times 30 equals to 420, 420 times 12 equals to 5040, 5040 times 10 equals to?

Mate: *Grinning*

Doctor: You see, it's these runny nose and cough that you'll get every once in a while. Those cancers, you know, lung and and all that might followed in ten or twenty years later. It's your nose now and maybe your oesophagus next.*Begins to scribble some notes on the newspaper on his desk*

By this time he even drew an alveolus and explained things. I forgot what was that all about on my way home.

We went further when he asked me about my job and what I do.

Doctor: Oh, we need lots of IT people like you now. I read it from this newspaper few days ago.*Pointing to his copy of New Straits Times with his earlier scribbles and cardiacal drawings on the edge*

Mate: *Smiling and nodding*(They don't need people like me, trust me.)

Doctor: Oh, so you read about it too?

Mate: Yeah, I think I read it from The Sun. *Showing a copy in my hand*

Doctor: The Sun. I don't really like them. I read NST all my life. My wife likes The Star. So when I'm home, I'll read The Star. But NST is still my favourite. My neighbours read The Star too. This newspaper*Pointing to my copy* I don't understand them. They make much noise. You see, I'm a peaceful person. Just let the government do their jobs. You know with bloggers and all that.

Mate: *Grinning* (Oh doctor, come next election you'll know and understand)

I left the room with a smile and a bunch of people at the waiting area looking at me weirdly.

The Imposter

2008-02-27T12:16:00.003+08:00

This is going to be short. Leading a double life has never been easy for me. People who don't know me really well have this high expectation on me. I may look like a cool straight guy they want to hang around with. I may look like a cool straight guy with girlfriends and has no problem bring back home one anytime. I may look like a cool straight guy who has wild Friday night outs, when in fact, I'm playing their games. I had never suggested anything but they seem to know more about me than myself. One even want to be in my sexual fantasy. It maybe just a joke but like I always say, be careful what you wish for, lest it come true. Right mate? Hehe.

When asked about what I should tell them when they keep asking me about my girlfriend and even wanted to see her, a good friend gave me a sluggish idea. Tell them that she flies, a stewardess you know. She flies, so it's not easy to see her.

Sounds good but I'm sorry, I'll not go to that extend. Once again, I'm not a liar mate.

So I go with the occasional, classic "I don't have one". Keep asking me and I'll keep chanting the same thing. They don't buy me, that's their bloody problem. It's never been easy for me. My heart will never be easy.

The Error

2008-01-27T11:06:00.010+08:00

I was with a friend at this hypermarket in our neighbourhood to duplicate a key. We were greeted with a sign that says the locksmith will be back in 15 minutes. So we decided to loiter around while waiting for him to return. We came back but the locksmith was still not there. After about a few seconds, a man hurriedly walked towards me and asked:

Man: Mr Wong?

Mate: *Nodding*(Thinking that he's asking me whether I'm looking for Mr. Wong, the locksmith.)

Man: *In a loud voice* I came all the way from Shah Alam because all these keys are not working!

Mate: Errr... I'm not Mr. Wong. I'm waiting for Mr. Wong. He'll be here in 15 minutes.*Pointing to the sign left on the counter*

Man: Ooo...you're not Mr. Wong. I thought you're Mr. Wong because you looked like him from the description given by my friend.

Mate:*Grinning*

Man: I'm so sorry, so sorry!

Mate: No, it's OK. No worries.

And Mr. Wong came into the scene at this moment.

Man: Ooo..that's Mr. Wong*Whispering* Eh, I tell you ah, you're much more handsome than him!

Mate: *Smiling with sparkles in my eyes*(Wakaka! Come on, I know you are ashamed of yourself because you've mistaken me for the locksmith but you don't have to go to that extend. Come ooooooon.)

While waiting for his keys to be fixed.

Man: You see this Mr. Wong ah, he's not really good at this. I have to give these keys to my children. One for my daughter and one for my son. I came all the way from Shah Alam to see him.

Mate: Yeah, he's fixing them now. You just forgive and forget.

Man: Wow, you really have a good heart. No wonder you didn't mad at me when I mistaken you for Mr. Wong. Other people sure have wallop me here!

Mate:*Grinning*(Wakaka! Do I look like a gangster? It's just a small mistake. Why would I want to wallop people? Wakaka! He's watching too much tv I guess.)

I wont go into details of our friendly and accidental conversation. Suffice it to say, that he asked for my background, work, nothing to brag really, but he even asked for the secret of my 'success' to share with her college daughter! Wakaka. Never thought that I'd really give an impression to a stranger!

The Roundup

2008-01-01T19:22:00.007+08:00

I bet no one really care about my year-end review but I'm just going to do it anyway. It's an absolute roller coaster ride last year. Bollocks after bollocks. Albeit some boon along the way. Here's my quarterly-review of last year's predicaments - and attainments.

First Quarter

It went pretty well. Lots of partying and new activities indulged. I can say it's a hassle-free, smooth-riding period for me. But I shouldn't get carried away by all these temporary notions. It's not always silver lining.

Second Quarter

I was smacked with something that I had never thought would happened to me. It's something I'd rather not elaborate here but enough to say that my action has taken its toll on me. Its repercussion almost end me up in a body bag. Let it be a lesson for me to be careful and reserved in the future. But it's fun playing adversary once in a while. It brings out the worst in you. I learnt more about myself in return.

Third Quarter

I ventured into something that I refused before. I should have listened to people more instead of taking things on my own. I always want to do everything myself, my own way. It is during this period that I become wiser(at least that's what I thought) and benevolent to my surroundings. I no longer thumping my chest. Modesty begins to seep into my life. Good karma knocking on my door. Like everyone else, I stumbled at times but some good Samaritans offered their hands and made me stand up again. I thank God for His graciousness.

Fourth Quarter

It started off pretty sombre but slowly escalated into an exciting level. I got a job that I dreamt off. I got lots of new and interesting friends. Oh I even bonded some friendships with some of my blog readers. Never thought that this narcissistic blog will catch anyone's attention. The demise of a good friend a few days before new year also left some marks in my life. I begin to ponder whether I'd be given enough time to prepare before my turn. I begin to appreciate people more.

The Highlights

2007-12-31T17:26:00.000+08:00

Here's my personal highlights of 2007:

Single of The Year: Fluorescent Adolescent by Arctic Monkeys

Album of The Year: Favourite Worst Nightmare by Arctic Monkeys

Band of The Year: Klaxons

Gig of The Year: Muse LIVE at Stadium Negara Kuala Lumpur

Video of The Year: Jigsaw Falling Into Place by Radiohead

Best Newcomer: Klaxons

Coolest Person of The Year: Pete Doherty of Babyshambles

Hottest Males of The Year: Alex Turner of Arctic Monkeys and James Righton of Klaxons

Hottest Female of The Year: Kate Nash

*Most Overrated Bands/Artists of The Year: LCD Soundsystem, Gallows, Les Savy Fav, Mika, Funeral For A Friend, Good Charlotte, Avril Lavigne, Nickelback

*Most Underrated Bands/Artists of The Year: Editors, Patrick Wolf, Battles, Modest Mouse, Bloc Party

The Band Who's Time Has Passed: U2

*TV Shows of The Year: Heroes, House, The Office(USA)

So what's yours?

* Listed in no particular order

The Shortie

2007-12-03T11:12:00.000+08:00

Just a shortie to share with you people. Maybe some of you have seen it before. Now here's 'Lucky Blue'...

The Banquet

2007-12-02T09:36:00.000+08:00

The wedding went well. The bride's first son arrived fashionably late. The guests were incredibly investigative. The bride's first son was incredibly, apprehensive.

"What are you doing now?"
"When are you getting married?"
"It's been a while eh?"
"Why are you so skinny? You're fat before."
"Are you on drugs?"
"Where's your girlfriend?"

Those were the inevitable queries bombarded continously without conscience to me. You know how uncles and aunties operate all this while. Can't wait for their funerals. A lot of ohs and ahs emitted into the air. And I have to breath in it.

"I think I'm drowning
Asphyxiated
I wanna break this spell
That you've created"

Muse-Time Is Running Out

Perfect lines to elaborate the turmoil.

The News

2007-11-19T13:13:00.000+08:00

Wohoo! My mom's getting married again! I already have two mommies and now I'm going to have two daddies! Hip, hip, hooray! Since I'm a little messed-up, I decided to get some help from the people I know. I sent this sms to my three girlfriends:

"My mom is getting married this month. Should I go back on that august day? Type A for No or B for No. Send it to I-Need-A-Drink.Tq."

One replied:

"Err the option is not an option anyway, she's your mom, she'd wan u 2 b there"

Another replied:

"C for YES"

Another one still trying to figure the logic.

I thought I only have to attend three weddings this month.

I can't wait what's next. My wedding?

'Tis the season to be jolly, fa la la la la la la la laaaaaaaaaaa.

The Questions

2007-11-13T12:18:00.000+08:00

Have you ever wondered how many questions have you ever answered all your life? How many questions have you asked today? We answer questions everyday. People ask questions every given day. Exams, interviews, everyday conversations, you name it. All these events trigger questions, one after another. It's like the highest level of conspiracy. OK, let me just stop this one here before I start another line of crap. Let's not try to be funky here. Hehe.

Moving on, questions pose by people serve many purposes. People ask questions to solve problems, to get one at times. We question ourselves to evaluate life, to reason actual facts. We ask questions to fill the blanks. Is it safe to say now that the most frequent character used by people all over the world are question marks? Better leave that job to the statistician eh?

Well I'm sure among those many questions, there are some that we can't wait for and there are some that we try to avoid(and probably pray to God never will be asked). Like "How's your girlfriend?". Now this one irks me the most. Better "Are you gay?" or one of those random "When are you getting married?" than THIS one. Like they know I have a girlfriend in the first place and asking about her well-being. I mean, come on, get a life. You don't even know whether I have one and you ask me 'her' well-being without even sure of 'her' existence!? Alright, alright, maybe they're just trying to be friendly or something. Friendly or something my arse. I wish I can say "I'm sorry for shattering your view about my future and nonchalantly breaking your heart into pieces but I'm gay. Yeah, I do boys. Sorry. *wink an eye*" but instead, I go for the classic "No, I don't have one" and they will go like "Oh come on, you sure have one, don't be shy...*patting my back*" and how happy I am if I can just strip them to the bones, right there, at that time.

Among other grave question that people frequently asked me is "Hey, I think I've seen you somewhere before but where eh?". This one, is a classic in its own right. As if I can be seen in Timbuktu this morning and in Ulan Bator this evening. Yeah, you'll feel that way when people ask you this everyday.

And recently, while being interviewed for a Software Engineer position. Among other questions posed:

Interviewer: Are you one of those bikers?

Job Hunter: No I'm not. I don't even have a bike.

Interviewer: Your friend's bike maybe?

Job Hunter: Noooo. (Yes, that's a loooong No from me).

Funniest question ever? It's either I look like a Mat Rempit or my smile is as charming as Valentino Rossi's.

Nevertheless, I got the job.

The Searching

2007-10-11T09:48:00.000+08:00

I want to take pictures everyday. I do not want to sleep my whole life. I am waiting for someone who is not real. I want to tell people my beautiful love stories. I just do not have one. I listen to many stories. I tell many too. I have found what works. I have found what does not. I choose not to remember things. I keep reminiscing. I have gone through the process. I am going through it again. I always look at the stars above my head. I forget the grass beneath my feet. I lost what I used to believe. I found it again. I walk barefoot on this rocky path. I will walk until I fuck up.

The Lappy

2007-09-10T17:09:00.000+08:00

I was supposed to post The Systems on the eve of Merdeka but Tommy's departure deterred the move. Tommy was found soaked in the water after a gory downpour. Well, not really soaked in the water of course, I exaggerated a bit just to add some drama here. Heh.

The roof is leaking again, after being repaired 2 or 3 years ago. It happened that I left Tommy unattended on the floor in my room on that morbid day and it happened that the water dropped from the ceiling right on top of Tommy's lid. Of all places. Even the lid is shut, the drips accumulated and strayed to the 4 corners. Eventually, the water managed to get into Tommy through the side speakers and through other openings that you can imagine. I even sucked the water out from both speakers instead of blowing air ala CPR. I mean, come on, I'd do anything for my loved ones! I bet you'd do the same given the same situation. Errrr...no? Oh God, I'm a freak!

Some good friends advised me to leave Tommy to dry for 1 week. One even suggested to leave him under the bright sun(now who's freaker?). Being a stubborn January guy(hey, they say people born in January is stubborn, I know I am), I turned him on after 1 day. And tadaaaaaaa..."Hardware failure. Bla bla bla...". I managed to catch a glimpse of the desktop for a few seconds before the blue screen with the warning came out.

Being a stubborn January guy, I refused to let him go. I turned him on again the next day and tadaaaaaaa... Tommy is back! I managed to smile again wherever I go. I kissed Tommy and thanked him for not giving up on me.

Two or three days later, while listening to the music, I heard the beeping sound, the sound that Tommy makes whenever the battery needs to be recharged. But then I realised, the AC power is switched on. It turned out that Tommy had begin to refuse the AC power and relies on the battery instead. So once the battery had reached its limit, Tommy is gone.

I brought him to the Acer Service Centre in Berjaya Times Square(BTS) but I was given a rude shock instead of good services. Here goes...

Fucker: What is your problem?

Customer: My laptop refused to turn on.

Fucker: Why cannot turn on?

Customer: I have no idea. It just...

Fucker: You're the user mah, you should know one.

Customer: I don't know and that's why I come here.

Fucker: This model no more spare part. It's the motherboard. This model is obsolete. Even if you give this to students, they sure don't want one.

Customer : So what do you suggest I do?

Fucker: Throw it in the drain. Buy new one. Nothing we can do here.

Yes people, that's the service I got! I don't know how that bastard end up working there. The way he speaks clearly shows how he was brought up. And I somehow wasn't myself that day! Didn't even retaliate! Probably because I didn't want The Shootings materialised? I should have thrown Tommy in his face eh?

I wouldn't have any problem to buy a new lappy if I were some millionaires' kid. I don't even have to waste my time talking to the shit head if I can afford to buy a new lappy. I've been with Tommy for 3 years now and I went through lots of shits to get him so that I'd be able to finish my final year project. I mean, even if he regrets being ugly all his life, he doesn't have to tell me to throw Tommy to where he's coming from.

So this working class guy, packed up Tommy and decided to head for KLCC for a second opinion. I was initially told by a friend who owns the same model to go to the service centre in Suria KLCC but mate, Suria is the last place you'd see me. I hate KLCC. Not the twin towers but the shopping mall! I don't know but I just don't like it. Even some of my friends share the same sentiment with me. In fact, we had never hang out in Suria together. OU rules! Hehe. I don't know, I was OK before but I couldn't recall when I started to develop this feeling. That explains why I was in BTS instead of KLCC. So, for Tommy's sake, I braved myself to Suria. I couldn't find the service centre there. It's not even on the directories. So I asked one of the guys from the notebook shop and guess what, the service centre has moved to BTS! That's the fucking service centre I went before!

I decided to go home and started mourning. I was sad. Sadden by what happened to me this year. The most horrible year of my life. I thought things will get better this year but it turned out bloodier. Shits after shits. There's one more service centre in Subang but I expect the same shit. Moral of the story? Don't buy any Acer shits.

A friend gave an idea for Tommy to be sent to Sunway Pyramid. We sent him to one of the asylum the next day. After being admitted for few days, the computer guy called and told me that the motherboard had to be replaced. It'd cost me around RM900! I told him not to replace anything. I took Tommy home the same day.

Tommy is put to sleep until his working-class owner is able to stand on his two feet again. Thanks for being there when I need you. I promise to bring you back once everything's OK.

Until we meet again Tommy.

The Gig

2007-09-10T17:08:00.000+08:00

Went to Hujan's last gig before Ramadhan at the MCPA Hall. They were awesome like always. The best band perform last eh? Photos taken but will only be uploaded once Tommy is back. The band which performed before Hujan was pretty good too. We were told they were from Jitra, Kedah and they called themselves Bourjuis if I'm not mistaken. They played songs from Arctic Monkeys mostly and I think that was a good first impression for a new band and for an Arctic Monkeys fan like me. Hope to see more from them again. The front man even sings in British accent!

Oh, I almost pass this one. Hujan has already started a controversy. I don't know where is this coming from but it sure started somewhere. Probably Noh or any of his band mates said something that people perceived as homophobic?

Being a rock star has its price mate. My advise is, stick to what you do best, that's to perform, to make people happy. Shut your big mouth if you don't know what you're talking about. People that support you come from various backgrounds. I'd definitely stop paying to see any homophobic bands. Why would I waste my hard-earned money for bands that hate people like me?

The Systems

2007-08-30T19:15:00.000+08:00

I just don't get it when my Java guru from India told me that her husband likes(not loves though) Malaysia. I expected her to say the reasons he likes it here are because of the foods or the weather(doubt that) or the people(doubt that too) or maybe kasut Gombak(Gombak-made shoes) but instead, he likes it here because, drum rolls please... 'Malaysia is systematic'. The moment she said that, I puckered my brows, stared at my pc monitor and started to think. I don't even know whether to be proud of it or to laugh. Out loud. Ironically on the same day(it happens everyday, but I thought why not give Malaysia benefit of the doubt once in a while), I saw people in a very long queue to buy ticket from the counter at the LRT station. The ticket machines installed on the wall were mere ruins left behind by the Portuguese. When efforts were made to encourage people to utilise the public transportation, the people are ready to take up the challenge but their enthusiasms were hampered by sorry services and facilities. What is so systematic when we have to buy tickets from the only counter in the station because the ticket machines refused your second note? Systematic my arse!

To avoid from this dodgy system(I can't fully escape from this system because I'm in the system and I just have to bear with it), I try to resort to the Touch 'n Go card, hoping that the misery of being in a long queue will over. I thought I'd only have to touch and go away from the impotency. The funny thing about this system is you can use the card at any stations but you can only reload it at selected stations. Even a bustling station like Pasar Seni is neglected from acquiring such 'privilege'. I guess Pasar Seni Station had lost its bid. Bid higher next time you barmy!

The ticket machines won't be able to read your card's balance. Remember, they're relics. You can go to the counter(at the lucky stations of course) or you can squint your eyes and look at the hopeless screen installed on the auto gate while touching your card on the panel provided, to check the balance. Even then, you just have to bear with the misleading screen. The numbers appeared are open for debate at the Parliament. Number 3 could be 8 and number 8 could be 5. Ambiguity at its best. So you touch and growl.

I like to ~~complain~~ give feedback for the sake of mankind *clear throat* and that explains why I put this up. I went to the Touch 'N Go(Whore?) Hub in KL Sentral twice to ask them why I was overcharged and they give me the same answer each time. I was told at first that they'd be able to track them after 1 day but the clown retracts and change her mind a few seconds later. They won't be able to track my transactions until the next 2 or 3 days. My simple theory is, the clown made this kind of joke because she doesn't want to see my face the next day.

She expects me to buy her explanation that the server is not updating today's transactions until the next 2 or 3 days. See? 2 or 3 days. No definite answer. This only shows that they themselves are not convinced of their own services and system.-->She gave me the Careline number so that they don't have to see my ~~monstrous~~ pretty face again.

I asked them, "So this is your solution?". "Yes and they'd be able to check your transactions with their system.", the clown jested. "Don't you guys have the same system here?", the monster asked. Read again the line with an arrow if you're keen to know the answer. That's the purpose of the arrow. Instead of asking you guys to seek line 256 for the answer, I put an arrow for straight solution. See how technology works? See my system?

So, the cycle of violence continues. No wonder skinny people like me can suffer from a heart failure!

Imagine the number of ~~complaints~~ feedbacks that have gone unreported because of this dodgy system. How many people don't give a damn to go there because they know this is the kind of service they're going to get? You might asked why I didn't just write a letter to the newspaper. Ever wonder why your complaints on the Internet service never made it to the newspaper? Ahah. Better leave it to the political blogs to disclose.

OK, back to the Touch 'n Go Blow. They should have set up a pub there instead of the Touch 'n Go Hub. At least the bartender is willing to listen to my problem. At least I come in sober and I go home happy!

You hear and see lots of things on the train everyday. Perhaps I should start a blog like this, just to share a Malaysian's side of story. I even tried once to look for fashion victims on the train but then luck is not on my side. Maybe I should try again. Or maybe I should stick to what I do best, whining.

Oh ya, the other day, there was a quarrel between a bloke and this lady who cut his line at this station I forgot where. When the door is opened, I heard the bloke said something like "Everyone's late for work but you should get in the line!". Well, obviously the lady cut the line and jump into the train. I think the lady said she's a lawyer and the bloke retorted "No wonder our legal system is like shit today!". Wakakaka! I feel like clapping and give the bloke a pat on his back! He's right! Someone like-minded at last! I mean, even if you're a lawyer, it doesn't spare you the line! It is probably the simplest unwritten rule followed by civilised people all over the world, you fucker! Don't you feel ashamed when KL is ranked at no 33 out of 35 cities in Reader's Digest's Global Courtesy Test? I'm fucking ashamed. I mean, 33 out of 35! What happened to KLites? Bolehland strikes again? Where have all the good values gone? Don't even let me start on how we fair on the road. Oh, and just look at the House of Parliament(House of Circus?) where we have jesters jeering and made fun about menses. What kind of society are we building here?

50 years of Merdeka and some of us are still not. How I wish sometimes I wasn't born in this country. But then again, which country in this world had ever sent a ~~gay~~ happy ~~visitor~~ Angkasawan to the space?

You go Malaysia!

Happy Merdeka guys. ;P

The Shootings

2007-08-25T01:34:00.000+08:00

I've been dealing with guns twice this week. The first was two nights ago when THEY tried to shoot me while I took shelter in a car. THEY keep on firing the window glass and I (with unrecognised person next to me) keep our heads down, behind the front seats, hoping that the car doors are good enough to shield me(well, us) from the incoming bullets.

The second event took place last night when THEY found me in a house and shot three other person with me before they took my life. THEY killed me. I was dead last night. THEY left us with blood all over the floor. As my body was lying motionlessly on the floor and my face facing the closed door, the only think that I can do was staring at the small opening underneath the door, waiting for someone to find our bodies before we decomposed.

I now know how it's like to be dead. A postman is your only hope. If he can smell the stench.

Not bad for two bad dreams eh?

The Tag

2007-08-08T19:30:00.000+08:00

Tagged by E.f.f.a.r.o.j.i.e(K.A) recently. Here are 6 not-so-weird things about me. At least, that's what I think.

1. I have a pair of lucky boxers. Yes people, and I'll put it on whenever I want things to go as planned. Or whenever I want to make the day special. As far as I can remember, it has only failed me once. Or twice. Maybe more. I wish I had more lucky boxers. And pretty boys in boxers.

2. I'm frantic whenever it's Friday the 13th. Call me superstitious but every time it comes, something bad will happen to me. Last time, my touch 'n go card wasn't working, my money was caught in the bloody ticket machine and few other things that I couldn't really recall. You can say whatever happened petty, but they sure turned me into a monster.

3. I'm pedantic. Especially in language, that whenever people give me letters, forms, fliers, websites or anything printed on paper, I can easily spot the mistakes at a glance, if there's any. As long as the mistakes are not repaired, I'll keep thinking about it and murmured it to myself. And to the people around me. The world is a happier place without spelling mistakes. But I can't spot my own spelling, grammatical mistakes. Not because there isn't any but I just couldn't. I leave it to heaven.

4. I love food and I like them raw. Sushi, oysters, salads, you name it. And I can eat raw meat. Shut up.

5. I like my soap clinical. Those flowery, fruity-smell soap will change me into a meaner person. They'll ruin my day. They will result in self-inflicted injuries. OK too much info. I'd rather not use any if I don't have any clinical-scented soap around. Not a big fan of shower gel though. Give me that sweet-smell soap and I'll hate you forever.

6. I ~~don't like~~ hate to wait and to be waited. Waiting is fucking wasting for people like me and I'd feel guilty if I have people waiting for me. But most of the time, I'd do the wait.

So there you have it. Looking back at them again, it's more like an angst list eh? Hmmm. Anything weirder I'd rather keep it to myself.

The City State

2007-07-06T20:44:00.000+08:00

I came back after twenty years and the city is fucking clean like before. The Sultan Mosque in Arab Street.

The DHL balloon on our way to Bugis Street. The balloon is part of the Half Price Singapore Surprise promotion they had until last week. We were in a hurry so we didn't make it there. Next time maybe. If it's still there..

Bugis Street, a lot in common with Petaling Street. Only that they don't have intimidating hawkers who act like thugs...

Just something taken from the car on our way to Marina Bay. It's Orchard Road and the place is super crowded. Ugh.

Orchard Road again. Spanking clean...and hot. I think it's hotter there than here in KL. Maybe because we have more trees. Yeah righttttt...

Hehehe. We managed to catch a gig in a bar called Woodstock in Long Marina Beach. This one is a black metal band and if you notice, a girl in leather bikini next to the satan worshipping frontman. They chanted satan! satan! hail satan and all kind of mantras there. No one's hurt though. It's a place where people play all kinds of music without intimidating each other. No cans or mugs flying. It's a place where people shared their music, minding their own business. If it wasn't for the musician mates we're with, we won't be there on its final night! The place had to be demolished to give way to the casinos....

Tanjong Pagar Railway Station where we had our late dinner after the gig and before we went to Marina Bay again. I'm not sure whether Malaysia had given up the land but then people happily come and go. Hmmm. And the place is not as clean. Feels at home. Agagaga. I had Nasi Ayam Peyet there. It's just chicken rice with sambal belacan(a hot shrimp paste condiment) but it tastes good because I was super starviiiiiiiiiiiing! A view from Jurong Hill around 3am. The lights are from this power plant island I forgot its name. Highly secured of course.

Well, there goes some of the pictures that I managed to capture during my short visit to Temasek. I was actually there for this wedding. I can tell you the wedding was much more happening than the one we had here with people took turn to perform the silat in front of the brides, kuda kepang, javanese dance and even joget lambak!!! I was too engrossed, savouring the many food they had that I didn't had the chance to take any pictures from the wedding. The foods were great. Nyum, nyummmmmmm.

The Unexpected

2007-07-05T19:28:00.000+08:00

Miahahaha!!!!! We were trapped inside a lift yesterday. Coming back from buying nasi lemak(rice cooked in coconut cream, slurrrrp) from nearby stall, we got into the lift and it suddenly stopped accelarating in between level 19th and 20th. It's my first experience trapped inside a lift! We kept on pressing the bell and the intercom but no one came to the rescue. So what did you do during the interval? I fantasised. Hmmm. What if the ropes snap and the lift plummeting to the ground? Will I save myself if I managed to jump right before the car hit the ground? Hehehe. Crazy thoughts eh? The lift finally accelerates after a few minutes. But stucked at level 20th. Had to use the stairs to go up.

I couldn't find something decent to depict nasi lemak. I think this one will do for the moment.

While talking about durian in the car and about the people who bring them aboard the lrt later today, we found a durian lying motionlessly in the middle of the road in our neighbourhood. Wakakaka!!! So I picked it up and took it into the car. There's this car opposite us trying to stop to pick it up too. Well sorry uncle, we got it first! Lalalala...

No decent video on durian on the road though...

The Gig

2007-06-29T08:58:00.000+08:00

Yeeeeeeeehaaaaa!!! We were at Laundry Bar last night to see Hujan, yes, again! Though Noh forgot (or you high on something mate?hehehe) some of the lyrics, the gig was still energetic and the wiggling crowd complemented them. Popsie and I were later joined by Brent and believe it or not, the gig started on time! It made me respect them more and more. Keep it up guys! We were then later joined by Jed and our four other mates. Jed was still ogling at Noh. Popsie and I think he's trying to tell something. I think he swings it both ways. Hmmm. *rubbing chin* We went to Uptown Damansara for our late dinner and we missed Inspirational Joni. I heard they are great. Catch them later I guess.

I had a slight fever and I'm heading down south tonight. Hopefully I'll get well by the time I reach there or maybe before I move my arse from here.

The Gig

2007-06-27T19:10:00.000+08:00

Hujan were phenomenal at Planet Hollywood last Saturday. It was even phenomenal when we got in for free! Weeeeeeeeeeee....Thanks to Fred for letting us in! But it's a norm and I can say, almost a formality in Malaysia that almost every event will never be punctual. The gig which is supposed to start at 1.30pm is still not started even after we had finished our lunch at 3pm!

They call it Rock Malaysia Ke-2(RMK2), the showcase was held in conjunction with Malaysia's 50th Merdeka Day and Hujan was the 4th band performed, if I'm not mistaken. And they rocked like, well, Hujan! God I love them and the technical shit they had earlier was forgotten when Noh started to sing in his melancholy voice. Am the drummer was great too!

Jed who was with us had to miss Hujan(and Noh, lalalala) in the eleventh hour as he had to go back to his workplace which only leave Popsie, her boyfriend and I to mosh in front of the stage.

We even might be going to their gig at Laundry Bar, The Curve tomorrow!!! Yehaaaaaaaaa!!!

The Gig

2007-06-17T03:36:00.000+08:00

Went to see 'Hujan'(Rain) last night at KL Jam Asia, Hartamas. The theme for the gig this time is 'Chenta Itu Bhuta'(Love Is Blind). I don't know if it's a theme or what, but whatever, it's another episode of 'An Evening In Peril'. That's what I see on the ticket. Yeah, suits well for Popsie who's having period pain all day! Agagaga. We had a great time though they only sang like 4 or 5 songs and even we screamed like hell for 'Ahmoi Chantek'(Pretty Girl), they didn't play it! And now I know that Noh the vocalist is a fucking pretty boy! Even Jed my straight mate had a crush on him and of course, yours truly too! Hehehe. Well, it's completely OK if it's me falling on boys but Jed? He always talk about girls, flirting this and that girl and now he's into Noh? Yeah, you're right, maybe he's just fooling around. But then, didn't they say 'Chenta Itu Bhuta'? Hmmm. Jed is cute. Errr, I'd fuck him. Ah, fuck this thought. No wonder I'm single all this while. Keep falling for the impossible.

Pretty boy Noh doing some sound check.

Pretty boy Noh roooooooocks! Hujan ruuuuuuuuuuule!

Oh ya, I think I've blogged before about Brent whom I met at this job interview more than a year ago. He got the job and I landed a job somewhere else. Heaven has a funny way of reuniting people. He's with us at the gig. Well, actually, I met him about two weeks ago at another gig at Laundry Bar, The Curve. Love Me Butch were there. Brent's one of Popsie's colleagues and used to bug Popsie through anonymous emails. Popsie pissed off, we made a pact and spammed his email. OK, that's a different story. Hehe. Sorry mate! Anyway,he got my number from Popsie(they're now best friends,whoops!) and texted me about 4 or 5 days ago and recalling me of the said interview. Lost friendship blooms again and there he was with us last night. A newbie in our dysfunctional family. He's cute but engaged.

Analogsix. I can smell The Loft when they play.

They Will Kill Us All. The MC associated them with The Strokes but I think they're more like Pennywise.

Thanks Popsie for telling me about 'Hujan'. Both of us bought their cds. Support local indie band mate! I'm proud that we have this kind of local band. And I like it when it rains!

The Closet

2007-05-24T19:25:00.000+08:00

You know you're in a hotter hell when you're outed by people. It's like a head-on collision. I can tell you it's not liberating. Outed inadvertently. I don't know, maybe it's no big deal for you guys out there but it matters to me. I don't know why people always do things without thinking of the repercussion. When things like this happen, who should I look for? Mates become strangers. You think you can trust these people but they spit you in the face.

Being outed when you aren't ready is horrible. Some people may say that I'm not comfortable with my sexuality, well fuck you, it's not you who's being outed. It's simple, I'm not ready and you don't have to be so handy. Being outed against my will is a fucking invasion of my privacy.What if people do something against your will, say, slitting your throat or stab you in the head? Wouldn't that be a bloody scene? Would that be a scene to celebrate?

To those who still in the dark, sexuality is personal. I had never admit that I'm straight because I believe, the more lying you do, the deeper the hole you dig. I prefer not to be out to some people for my own sake, the sake of my family and that should be respected. And one more thing, just because I tell stories about pretty girls, doesn't make me an instant straight. Telling and feeling are different stories altogether. I do tell stories about pretty girls simply because the girls are pretty! No intention to mislead people to think that I'm straight, I mean, gays talk about pretty girls too! They have eyes you fuckers!

I don't know what make they think they're superior that they can surpasses my rights of my sexuality, myself. To those who don't know me, I prefer to have cliques among straights. Call me cocky but it's just the way I am. And these straights are the greatest I can ever have. And I'm the kind of guy who has different cliques for different occasion. It's not that I don't have gay mates at all. I do and mostly it's a friend of a friend of a friend. I don't have the privilege to have gay mates who I grow up with. My ups and downs were mostly shared with my straight mates. They say everything happens for a reason. I try to make myself to understand this. I try to justify this by telling myself that I am a lucky bastard with mates who will always be there when I need them. Well, what I'm trying to say is, outed to gay mates is fine but being outed to straights who you don't want them to know is like getting killed a number of times.

Just like Kenny McCormick.

Oh my God! They killed Kenny!

You bastaaaaard!

The Book (Af)Fair

2007-05-05T23:09:00.000+08:00

I don't know what's got into me but I got myself the book last Wednesday from the KL International Book Fair held at the PWTC. I knew about the book somewhere on some political blog I couldn't recall. Wanted to blog about it right after I got home but decided to hold it until I finished. Could have read it in one sitting but then the first week of the month calls for some spontaneous outdoor activities.

The last time I bought a book was during the War Criminal Conference and Exhibition, 'World Conquest Through World Jewish Government'...and I'm still part-way through it!

One of the reasons I bought Dina Zaman's 'I Am Muslim' was because there's a topic that tells about Muslims who happen to be gays, hijab-clad lesbians included. And shamans. And virginity. And I like the part when she went to Jakarta. You got to read it yourself! Not going to tell everything here.

The ah mois(girls) manning the booth(Horizon Books) were not really keen attending a bloke in t-shirt, faded jeans and trainers I guess. Maybe I didn't suit their descriptions of target readers for 'that kind of book'(whatever is that mean...). An interviewer for a quite long job interview once told me that I looked playful but he gave me a chance anyway. You can say I always get the benefit of the doubts. Not sure whether it's a good or bad thing. Fuck it. And some people looked at me suspiciously when I browse(more like reading them) the books at the Brunei's State Mufti Department(books on the mufti's fatwa and the banning on smoking caught my attention there). OK back to the ah mois, one of them begins to say things after I showed some interests on some other books with serious titles on the shelves. And when I was browsing Newsweek, Forbes alike at this other booth, the guy confidently suggested me to get those for my brother or sister, I mean, these fuckers need cognitive therapy! Maybe I should go there in my office attire or maybe I should put on skullcap or keffiyeh to thwart these prejudicial epilepsies! Maybe I need to work on my appearance. Too laid-back I guess. What happened to 'don't judge the book by its cover' eh?

Back home when I told my mates what I got from the fair, they have this surprised faces on them. They didn't know half of me.

And have you guys watched Spidey 3? Went to see it last Thursday with my mates at Cineleisure. Not bad for a comic-adapted movie. But the scene where Peter plays the jazz piano, mortifying MJ reminisces me to a scene where Stanley serenading Tina in Coco Bongo nightclub. Remember 'The Mask'?, another comic-adapted movie. I don't know why does this always happen to me but my seat is shaken again! Last time it was this obese guy(no offence to plus sizers out there ok) with his girlfriend and he(I hope you die in an earthquake! You like it shaking right mate?) stopped when I turned my back and stared at him. Wanted to yell at first but didn't want to make a scene. But this time, I turned around and it was this little kid! Feel like throwing the troll in front of the big screen, so help me god. If only I can eject the seat and bring him along to heaven(too much tv eh?). The parents? They only know how to breed nowadays. Made me hate kids even more!

Happy Birthday Nef.

The Exchange

2007-05-01T23:03:00.000+08:00

A small talk between me and two middle-aged ladies.

Lady One: "Where are you from?"

Mate: "Petaling Jaya."

Lady One: *Nodding* "Ooo... Kolumpo... (Kuala Lumpur...)"

Mate: "Errr...Petaling Jaya, is in Selangor."

Lady One: *Turning to Lady Two next to her* "Where's Petaling Jaya?"

Lady Two: "Kolumpo..."

Mate: *Gazing at the beach in front, smiling.*

Happy Labour Day guys!

The Beasts

2007-04-30T01:06:00.000+08:00

Errr...excuse meeeeeeeee, can't help it but I overheard you sayiiiiiiing, they did it again? Reeeeeeally? Like, really REEEEEALLY? Them apes have stopped giving us freeeeee newspapers. Can you fill meeeeee in? Pretty pleaseeeeeeeeee...pleaseeeeee...

Damn it! Was it me or these water-filled ears? Gulp! Can't hear myself!!! Gulp! Need some air!!! Gulp! Gulp! Soooo...does that mean five meals a day now? Mmmm...six maybe?

Bbbbblimey!!! You serious? Bbbbbloody bbbbbreeders!!!

Oi! I heard they made it again? They made it right? Come oooon, don't give me that look now!

Told you! They'll definitely made it even they put this sexy arse of mine next to that balancing widget, what your mom call it?

Baaaaaaaaaaabe!!! You there mate? You there? Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaabe!!!

Tadaaaaaaa!!! I'm here! Oink! Oink! I'm here! Oink! Oink! Let's celibate errr... oink! celebrate!!! Oink! Oink!

The Play

2007-04-23T15:59:00.000+08:00

Gory and morbid at times. That's how I can describe the play we went to see last night. It's been a while since I last went to one. The last one was last year, 'The Fastest Clock In The Universe' in KLPAC, Sentul West. Last night was my first Malay play and it's called 'Tanda' or Sign. I only know about it when Put called and asked me two hours before it begins! Turned out Laz's friend was one of the directors for the six-part play. And that's why we were there. And this director bloke is hot.

Held at the National Arts Culture and Heritage Academy(ASWARA) formerly known as ASK I guess, our first time there for most of us. We were surprised when we arrived, as it was a crowd-puller! We opted to sit on the floor ala hippies at first since the bleachers were packed full with 'eager spectators' I can say. After some squeezing act by the folks in the bleachers, we managed to secure some space.

'Tanda' is an agreed collaboration between six directors of ASWARA's students, confronting with the signs of doomsday, Armageddon, Judgment Day or whatever your mom call it (hence, 'Tanda'), pillared by several hadiths. This play is heavily peppered with Islamic perspectives which make it hard for others who's not familiar with this religion to digest the tenacious simulations of the 'signs'. Thanks to the accompanying multimedia presentations, a layman like me who struggled throughout the play managed to swallow some bits and pieces.

A scene that still lingers in my mind is the two Datins sharing stories about their 'cats' and what they feed them. It's a metaphor or something but I don't get it. But it's alright I guess, don't swallow more than you can handle, right? Can't let my mind be bothered by some cat chat though.

The prominent scene was when everyone hastily prepared to welcome the 'Yang Terhormat' or 'The Honorable' depicted solely from a given hadith:

"The world will not pass before it first belongs to a mean fool son of a mean fool (luka` ibn luka`)."-Ath Thabrani.

Reminds me of Muse's 'Knights of Cydonia' poignant lyrics, "How can we win when fools can be kings?".

The above picture is from a scene where people were dancing in a club while a muezzin(not in the picture though) is calling to prayer. The muezzin later went to sleep. We weren't allowed to take any pictures. I defied. Can't help it mate!Hehehe.

Just like in the cinema or any other places that need you to switch off your fucking mobile with your fucking 'machine kuda'(horse race slot machine) ringtone, the play wasn't spared from this fucking selfish pre-historic animal behaviour. I don't know what's with this people, but can I suggest that we shove the fucking mobiles up their fucking arseholes next time?

The Loft

2007-04-14T22:17:00.000+08:00

The only thing that's neat last night at Zouk's The Loft was this:

The flier.

Other than that, fucking noises. Maybe it's because of this Lxxxtroneek thing, I don't know but lots of shits last night. And right before we get in, we were asked to fill out some form and I hope it's for the invitation to the Topshop/Topman Fashion Rocks! happening next Friday. One can always hope eh?

The Movie

2007-04-07T16:35:00.000+08:00

Maybe some of you guys have watched Beautiful Thing before but I only managed to watch it last night. Thanks to the p2p program again! Hehehe. Not going to make a review or something but it brings back old memories. To those who have yet to watch the movie, it was produced in the 90s, so just bear with their fashion sense OK. Like other gay movie, Beautiful Thing is about Jamie who's in love with Ste, a cute footballer(an Arsenal fan) who lives next door, coming to grisp with their sexuality. Boy-next-door eh? Corny. And yeah, Leah(watch this movie and you'll know who she is) is one funny character and I can't help but smiling alone here just thinking about her, especially when she's trying to open the door while high on something. Enough said, don't want to be a spoiler. Here's a trailer that I found:

The Radio

2007-04-06T21:38:00.000+08:00

Have you guys listened to traxxfm before? I'd never until last night. What really triggered me to listen was the stimulating(much hyped?) ad in The Sun. If it wasn't for the ad, I wouldn't know that they have this show called 'Alternation' every Thursday night where they play Modern Rock, Alternative/Indie Rock, Punk Rock, New Wave. The show kicked-off after the 18-minute monotonous news. It's not that I don't like listening to news but the ad says the show starts at 10. The ad is fucking deceptive. So next time(if there's ever next time), I'm going to tune in 18 minutes after 10.

Funny thing was when one of the listeners even had the guts to request for Lindsay Lohan's! Ahahaha! You alright mate?! Go ask the bloody top-40 stations then! I'm not saying traxxfm is the best station around but at least they had this kind of show for Indie lovers. Even Maya the DJ sarcastically said that it's one of her favourite requests. And Maya, please don't play Bowling For Soup(Poop?) again mate, it hurts...and please, no more of those chart-topping, Americana, bubblegum, pseudo Indie Rock bands. You know what I mean.

By the way, if you google traxxfm, you'll be warned 'This site may harm your computer'. What the fuck is wrong with the site? I don't have the balls to proceed this one. Any takers?

The Night Out

2007-03-24T21:53:00.000+08:00

My good mates and I went to Ruums to see Nidji as we won some tickets. Didn't expect to get the posters and it really meant a lot to me as I'm a big fan of Heroes! Can't wait for Season 2! And Nidji was awesome!!! Fucking awesome!!! You can say I'm a big fan of them too and they played my favourite number Disco Lazy Time first place! Hehehe. Love you guys!!! Didn't get to mosh like before at Muse's as I'm holding the posters tube. As it's still early after the gig, we decided to hit our favourite spot in town, Zouk's The Loft. DJ Bunga was terrific as always. Thanks Lim for the great music you played last night! Quite a number of Bloc Party's eh? We really had a good time!

Yeah, eat your hearts out guys! Hehehe.

The guy on the right is a hottie who won the Nidji impersonation contest. I bet he's a good fuck!.

Ugh Randy(second from right). Even hotter. A good fuck too!. Wake me up tonight... Drive me to the town....aaa aaa aaa Sleep with me tonight... He's my lonely wine...aaa aaa aaa

The Bands

2007-03-21T04:40:00.000+08:00

I bet some of you guys have listened to The Strokes' Juicebox and watched the music video before but this one is the uncut version. Yeah I know I should put it here last year but only recall it now. Many things going on inside my head lately. This video is pretty weird but the song is great. Yeah of course, am a big fan of The Strokes. Sexy guys in the toilet anyone? Why won't you come over hereeeeee?!!!!! We've got a city to looooooooove!!!!!! Why won't you come over hereeeeeeeee?!!!!!! We've got a city to loooooooove!!!!!! Found out about a local band called Laila's Lounge somewhere on the Net couple of months ago. A real catch for indie rock lovers.

The Quiz

2007-03-20T14:00:00.000+08:00

Got a lot of time to waste like me? Take the quiz then.

What's with the armchair eh? Love is like boxing? Corny. Boxing in boxers before making love. Neat. Need to let a few people into my life? Ugh come on, don't let me judge myself now. Stop being so evil? Biting people in the neck is evil now eh? Too dark to feel good about? Sticking needles into a doll is not my thing ok. A black hole of scary disillusion and Satanism? Hahaha, I'm a witch now? Yeah, sometimes I wish I can cast spells. Who hasn't? No? A puppy? Hmmm...an iguana maybe? They eat less.

The Events

2007-03-15T21:38:00.001+08:00

These are captured moments of what basically happened today in PJ.

I saw this flooded car park opposite Bali. Water overflows onto the road to the building next to the LDP every time when there's heavy downpour. This thing has been going on for more than 5 years now and still. Where's the local authority? There's got to be some way to divert the water.

I saw this hottie at Ikano Pet Safari. Wanted to take him home but I don't know where to put him in my cluttered, post-explosion room. Wanted to take one home a long time ago anyway. I shot this one after I was told not to. Hehehe. Hang in there mate! I'll take you home soon!

I saw this cutie in my drink! It's pretty dim but it's some worm or leech or something. I don't know, but I'm sure it's a creepy crawling creature. Didn't really want to make a scene but my mates insisted me to complaint to the unfriendly manager. The manager came to apologise and asked me if I need anything. Told him to make sure this thing won't happen again. By the way, it's Ikano's Uncle Lim's. On another note, check out this Gay Bands and Safe Bands. This site is a fucking joke.

The Expulsion

2007-03-12T01:09:00.000+08:00

Bloc Party-Compliments Thom Yorke-Harrowdown Hill My first poem of the year. I tend to write one when the bloody feeling returns. And sometimes when I'm mad at someone. Better this than shooting them in the head, right mate? Save Me Save me, From all the cryptic reasoning, From depraved convictions, Rotten hearts. Save me, From all the dogmatics whores, From broken beats, Gluttonous hands. Save me, From all the phony credences, From noisy pigs, Deceitful eyes. This is an award-winning music video Viorar Vel Til Loftarasa (Good Weather For Air Strikes) by Sigur Ros, an Icelandic post-rock band depicting two boys kissing on a football field. Didn't they say love is blind?

The Video

2007-03-08T02:24:00.000+08:00

CSS-Let's Make Love And Listen To Death From Above Maybe some of you guys have seen this funny video before. Bumped into this one while looking for some videos from the recent MUSE gig. Hehehe. Told you earlier that you have to bear with my PMS (it's post-muse syndrome! what were you thinking?). Here's 'Music For One Apartment And Six Drummers'...errr whatever that means...

Personally, I prefer the one in the bathroom. Shared your toothbrush before? Hehehe...

The Gig

2007-02-26T04:21:00.000+08:00

A lot has been said and written about the gig. I'm going to make this short. Opening song was as expected since I had a hunch it's not going to be much different from the Jakarta's gig. I was right except they played 19 songs here instead of 17!!! Here's the Malaysian setlist:

1.Knights of Cydonia

2.Hysteria

3.SBH

4.Butterflies and Hurricanes

5.Assasin

6.Citizen Erased

7.Hoodoo

8.Apocalypse Please

9.Feeling Good

10.Sunburn

11.Starlight

12.Plug In Baby

13.Map of The Problematique

14.TIRO

15.New Born

16.Soldiers Poem

17.Invincible

18.Stockholm Syndrome

19.Take A Bow And yes, they played Invincible and I sang my heart out till my voice's gone!!! And there was this girl standing next to me, laughing while I'm shouting and singing along like crazy. Girl, this boy just want to have fun and if I was too loud, blame the raging adrenaline! By the way, there's no such thing as too loud in a gig!

It's like a dream come true and our 2-month wait is finally over. And what's the difference between The Pitt (the so called VIP area) and our Rock Zone? Nil, none, zero, nada, zilch!!! Ahahaha!!! You guys were duped, big time! Right Put? They should have installed the barricades instead of that bloody useless crime-scene tape!!! What were they thinking? That we going to meditate there and starring at the moon? Damn right we moshed!!!

What got us wilder was when Matt says 'Selamat Petang Kuala Lumpur' and 'Kami Cinta Malaysia' while Dom keep on saying 'Terima kasih' a few time. Corny eh?

To the boys and girls whom I've kicked, stepped on or even squashed, sorry!. Especially during TIRO. It was intentional mates! Hehehe. So that I have some space for myself! And for my mental friends of course!

And thanks to the cute guy standing next to me for giving me way to take some pictures. Felt like kissing you but it's a gig, not some wild gay party!

My plug in babyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!

Crucifies my enemies

When I'm tired of givinggggg!!!!!

My plug in babyyyyyy!!!!!!

In unbroken virgin realities

I'm tired of livinggggg!!!!!

What's next? Radiohead? Yeah keep on dreaming!!!

MUSE World Tour '07, Live at Stadium Negara, Kuala Lumpur, Sunday 25th February 2007.

The Review

2007-02-24T14:41:00.000+08:00

The Fratellis-Chelsea Dagger

This is just a track-by-track review on Muse's Black Holes and Revelations since it's almost 18 hours before the gig. All songs reviews are made in alphabetical order.

Assassin

I hate to make comparison but this one I can't resist. Initial tune reminded me of the Knight Rider theme song. Political and subversive lyrics:War is overdue/The time has come for you/To shoot your leaders down/Join forces underground, though it looks like it was written by a 13-year-old kid.

City of Delusion

This one made my body moves. Not really my favourite but Matt's energetic chorus amused me. Flamenco anyone?

Exo-Politics

I hope Zouk's The Loft will play this song when my friends and I have fun there. Great track to dance to, hands down. Definitely Indie clubbers beauty.

Hoodoo

It's a shame that this track made itself in the album. If I were to close my eyes while listening to this, I'd say Thom Yorke's singing. Not that Thom is bad, but I can tell that this one will fade without delay and die at once.

Invincible

Another overused military drumbeats? Stop it and move on. I've had enough of this. Clever use of distorted bass lines anyway.

Knights of Cydonia

Probably one of the best tracks. I've reviewed this before here.

Map of The Problematique

I have no problem with this one. It's honest and didn't patronise fans like the over-hyped-radio-friendly SBH.

Soldier's Poem

Slow number, reminded me of Louis Armstrong's What A Wonderful World. Irritating.

Starlight

One of my favourites. I've reviewed this before here.

Supermassive Black Hole

Despicable. I've reviewed this before here.

Take A Bow

Inventive composing and chord changes. Another standout track. Ferocious with massive guts. Can bee seen as a direct attack against that bastard and his counterparts that I don't even want to have their names here.

Overall, BHR surpasses the average line. Maybe seeing them live tomorrow night may change some of my thoughts? Matt, Dom and Chris, see you guys there!

The Series

2007-02-10T17:53:00.000+08:00

Guillemots-Annie, Let's Not Wait

Razorlight-Stumble And Fall

The Futureheads-Decent Days And Nights

I'm obsessed with Heroes now. It's addictive. Almost like a drug but this one keeps getting better. I've been watching till episode 14 now. Thanks to the p2p program. Really can't wait for the next one. I only hope that they won't started putting on spandex. I'd die unhappy if they did.

My favourite character for the moment is Hiro. He's not cute I know but it's his abilities that matter. I have many things in my mind if I possess his time-bending ability. Mostly personal. Things will be different. Totally different. I'd not have such great friends I'm enjoying now if I were to change where I started. Might end up in another part of the world. Might end up as another people's freak as well!. Things might be better but I can't imagine having different kind of friends than I'm having right now. I won't get better. These ones are the best.

Being mind-reading Matt is cool too. Just how much do you wish to know what other people really think right before they really spit out their minds? Don't you want to know what those cute guys think when they are looking and passing in front of you? Won't it be easy to please your partner/s(I like living in plurality)? Won't you get better bargain at the flea markets? But thinking about it again, people will start to avoid me once they know that I know they want to kiss or kill me. I'd become their freak then.

Invisible man Claude is another character featured in Heroes(I'm such a spoiler eh?). Don't you ever go and think that you're alone when you know that someone you know is invisible! One of them might be in your room while you doing that thing you do. You know what I mean. You might as well indulged in a threesome when you weren't even aware of it! Scarry eh?

All in all, I just want to know why the heroes have the powers that they do. I want to be a hero too!

The People

2007-02-08T18:52:00.000+08:00

The Futureheads-Trying Not To Think About Time

The Futureheads-Meantime

It's funny when people tried to convince others of something that they don't believe. It's even funnier when the shits they said snarled right back in their faces.

Conviction is one thing but precedent events eventually carried the day. You guys might wonder what the hell is this all about. Just another ramblings triggered by continued intimidations of stuck-up, opinionated bigots swarming my average days. It's like a rampant smearing campaign, like nothing matters other than their shits. Rumour has it they won't stop. Unless I rape them.

I habitually talked from experiences and more than often, attentively listen to things I was not subjected to(although sometimes my mind wanders like a boar in the wilds). Criticism may followed later after I made myself understand of what being told.

Just like Put, a good friend who continously telling me "Don't know why but we attract weirdos..." after sharing our everyday stories on how we encounter freaks of all kinds. As much as I hate it, fact is, these people making news.

Afterall, it's a free country we are living here, am I wrong?

Pardon me. I'm barely sober.

The Moan

2007-01-28T20:45:00.000+08:00

Interpol-Evil

Have you ever thought of running away from where you are now? Running away from what you have now, just go somewhere else, far away from here and start anew? Well certainly this thought wasn't coming out of nowhere. If you have the same thought, chances are you are having a life in hell like mine-wake up in the morning-go to work doing the same things-be the subject of blame when things went wrong-watching other people get the credits when it's you who worked the shits up-go back home and it's a bloody same day tomorrow.

You might think this is just another disgruntled labour who should get another job or channel his grievances to the right avenue. I say go fuck yourself because this is my avenue and I can do anything I want within my fucking avenue.

Sometimes I feel I just want to lie in a field of grass and watch the stars but I know it's impossible to do that here because you might be robbed or killed. It's not safe here anymore. Few days ago, two people were slashed in a broad daylight, here in my neighbourhood. Just what the fuck is going on here? This is not the place I used to know before. It's not even safe anymore to go walkies around the neighbourhood. I dont know about yours, but mine is slowly depreciating.

The Song

2007-01-15T05:52:00.000+08:00

The Coral-In The Morning

Razorlight-In The Morning

Listening to Muse's Knights of Cydonia reminisces me of Queen's Rhapsody Bohemian albeit its agnostic lyric. I'm sorry if I sound cliché here but I can't stop talking about them until 'The Day' comes...and probably you have to bear with the talks that come after that. Heh. The only thing that I'm afraid of right now is last-minute cancellation. Fuck them if they cancel this. I'm totally out of Malaysia if they do that! No, I'm serious!

OK, back to the song, personally I think it's political. I mean, look at this:

And how can we win? When fools can be Kings and No one's gonna take me alive The time has come to make things right You and I must fight for our rights You and I must fight to survive

I dont know what do you guys think about this but with what is going on today, who's not political?

Anyway, agnosticism and politics run through my veins right from the beginning and I think I can swallow this one right.

The Boy

2007-01-14T19:07:00.000+08:00

Suede-Beautiful Ones

It's Nef. He's back. Or maybe he's been here all the while but I didn't know. I saw him in the rain just now. He looked at me from far and walked his way. Ugh, fuck him. I've had enough problems.

The Ticket

2007-01-08T18:46:00.000+08:00

Muse-Showbiz

Need I say more? *chin up

The Whine

2007-01-01T19:52:00.000+08:00

The Smiths-There Is A Light That Never Goes Out

While most people reveal their new year's resolutions in their first entry of the year, I just want to bitch about my unfulfilled last year's resolution. The one and only resolution. It's more like a wish actually. It's my failed attempt to gain my weight! When everyone is killing themselves to lose weight, I on the other hand killing myself by eating everything I think that can make me 10kg heavier. Yes people, 10kg heavier!

At 170cm I look like a lamp post that can be plucked anytime with the weigh I have now. Not that I'm too skinny, it's just that I think my current weight is not good enough.

On a second thought, it's not that it was really unfulfilled at all. I managed to gain 5kg last year, thanks to the generous food takings which I hope to repeat this year. I pledge to gain the missing 5kg this year.The mission continues. Happy New Year guys!

The Highlights

2006-12-31T21:40:00.000+08:00

The Kooks-Naive

Here's my personal highlights of 2006:

Single Of The Year: Nobody Move, Nobody Get Hurt by We Are Scientists

Album Of The Year: Employment by Kaiser Chiefs

Band Of The Year: Arctic Monkeys

Gig Of The Year: Thom Yorke's The Eraser Listening Party At The Loft.

Video Of The Year: Here It Goes Again by OK Go

Best Newcomer: Lily Allen

Coolest Person Of The Year: Brendon Urie of Panic! At The Disco

Most Overrated Band Of The Year: U2

Most Underrated Bands Of The Year: Bloc Party, Kasabian.

The Band Who's Time Has Passed: U2

TV Shows Of The Year: House, Lonely Planet 6 Degrees, The Office, Rockstar:Supernova, Nip/Tuck, Prison Break.

Film Of The Year: Little Miss Sunshine

The Worst

2006-12-30T04:46:00.000+08:00

The Zutons-Pressure Point

The worst night at The Loft. Yes, you heard me. Last night was proper bollocks. A perfect disaster. A melancholic predicament. Two and a half hour of nincompoop noise doesn't make Milan Baros spreads his legs for me. Well of course, Mr Baros has nothing to do with this but I was bloody dejected! I'd rather spend my time learning some culinary skills or making handicraft out of condoms. Saving songs for new year. That's what the dj said!. I mean, come on, it's not like we are going to fuck you for playing the same songs today and on new year eve! The fact that they played songs from Muse, The Strokes and Radiohead in the last fifteen minutes certainly didn't complement for the first two and a half horrible hour we endured!

By the way, the guy in white belt is a definite hotness!. Pretty and rugged. Heh.

The Holiday

2006-12-25T10:33:00.000+08:00

Hard Fi-Tied Up To Tight Finally, the gifts were wrapped. Not that it's important for me on Christmas, it's just a small gesture of gratitude, a token of appreciation for friends alike.

Last night was slightly...how should I put this...ok, horrendous. My good friends and I went to 'Glow' (KL's old Modesto's) and the place was pathetic. We entered for free since this friend of my good friends knows the guys at the entrance. The music was terrible and what more can I say if a club is full of Mat Rempits? I really can't believe I was there!

Anyway, to all my good friends(you know who you are), thanks for the presents and have A Merry Christmas!

The Gig

2006-12-16T10:04:00.000+08:00

Muse-Starlight

A good friend informed me yesterday that Muse is coming next February! I know I gave them bad review on their first single but have you listened to the latest single, Starlight? I only have one word to describe it, revitalising. And I bet it's going to be a durable piece.

Their gig in Singapore is on the 16th of January 2007 while it's on the 25th of February in Malaysia. I've been waiting for such exciting events for a long time and I don't want to miss this one.

At last, a tremendous British band on our shores!

The Beast

2006-10-04T14:53:00.000+08:00

Snow Patrol-Chasing Cars

I gave him some water. He looked at me, howled and started to mount and licked my hand. "Easy boy, easy...", I told him. I pushed the water container towards him but he kept on mounting me. I rubbed his head and stroked his neck to calm him down. He obeyed. I left him there but he followed me from behind. I told him to stay. From my lawn, I saw him drinking from the container. I smiled.

He's been there for three days. Skinny and exhausted. I think he's lost. Or the owner left him there. He still has collar around his neck.

When I got back from a night out with some friends, he's no longer there.

The Night Out

2006-09-17T16:24:00.000+08:00

Dirty Pretty Things-Wondering Yes, we did it again! Went to see NRG and like before, they were awesome! The songs they played were almost similar to last Saturday's but we had good time anyway. There were this couple (straight of course, but didn't look like girlfriend and boyfriend, friends maybe) danced to the tune of 'I Will Survive' in unison and they were cute! Not physically cute but their antics were! Can't believe I mention this. Anyway, gay clubs won't suck if they have bands like this. Even if they don't have live bands, I'd frequent them if they play more from the British rock scene.

The Night Out

2006-09-10T14:10:00.000+08:00

Kaiser Chiefs-I Predict A Riot

It turned out that NRG is a great band. OK, let say this together, NRG is a great band! I've never heard them play before but last night's performance was fucking awesome! First class act! They totally made my night! I really mean it. They even played Radiohead! I loooooove you guys! We moshed in front(stuck raving in front!) of the stage throughout all 3 sessions. Definitely going to see them again. Next Saturday maybe?

The Instigator

2006-09-07T13:53:00.000+08:00

Milburn-Cheshire Cat Smile Tenant: Chief tenant, can I pay the rent on tuesday? I'm in Kluang right now. Chief tenant: Next year's Tuesday? Tenant: Aiya...come on la...Next Tuesday please... Chief tenant: Aiya...come on la...Right now please... Tenant: I cannot go out la... Chief tenant: Not my problem I guess... Tenant: Chief tenant, Please...Next Tuesday. I promise. Chief tenant: Hmmm.Lets play my game. What if you die next Tuesday? What will happen to your promise?

An exchange of text messages between my housemate and I. He just don't get it eh?

The Inevitable

2006-08-02T14:54:00.000+08:00

Radiohead-There There

Ode for Jarmen Kell

You vanished,

I thought you run and hide,

You banished,

I like it when you didn't abide,

You perished,

I know you saw the light...

Jarmen Kell R.I.P

The Failure

2006-07-28T19:37:00.000+08:00

Failure - Smoking Umbrellas Ugh. Phil didn't make it. Damn. Bye Phil.

The Gay Club

2006-07-16T10:13:00.000+08:00

Hard Fi - Hard To Beat Went to Orange last night. The place sucks.

The Procrastination

2006-07-16T09:42:00.000+08:00

My Chemical Romance - I'm Not Ok (I Promise)

I was supposed to kill myself last week but I didn't. Still here. I don't know what stopped me. Faith? Hardly have any. Aaaaa...I lack ideas of how to...

The Rockstar

2006-07-12T08:25:00.000+08:00

Panic! At The Disco-I Write Sins Not Tragedies Oh no. Not again. I think I have a crush. Yes, again. He's pretty. He's sexy. He's rugged. He's Phil Ritchie! One of the Rockstar Supernova's contestants. Heh. He can sing and he rocks my heart!

Find out more about him at rockstar.msn.com

The Match

2006-07-10T08:08:00.000+08:00

Interpol-Slow Hands

I was at Cristro's Hartamas last night for the World Cup Final. The atmosphere was intense during the penalty shootouts. My screams and shouts paid off when Italy win! The mostly-France-supporters crowd dispersed immediately after they woke up from their dreams. Heh. Eat your heart out!

L'Italia il campione della tazza del mondo!

The Launch

2006-07-08T16:49:00.000+08:00

Thom Yorke - The Eraser Analyse The Clock Black Swan Skip Divided Atoms For Peace And It Rained All Night Harrowdown Hill Cymbal Rush Yes. I was there! We were there! It was awesome! They played Thom Yorke's and Radiohead's and I was in heaven! There's nothing like having people with similar interests around you. There's nothing like it. Lots of pretty boys that I wished to fuck them all. Heh. None of us win any CD from the lucky draw. So I guess I have to get The Eraser myself. One of my happiest night. The Loft is definitely the place to be! I love Thom Yorke!

The Shits

2006-07-08T08:56:00.000+08:00

Arctic Monkeys - Mardy Bum Yes, shits happened. Put's car was smashed when we got back to the car from The Loft. Three cars were smashed. Some of our friends who promised to come to the album launching failed to turn up.

The Loft

2006-07-04T08:52:00.000+08:00

Radiohead - High & Dry I'd probably go to The Loft this Friday. Cross toes. Hopefully no shits happen. Really want to be there this Friday. Thom Yorke's first solo album, The Eraser will be launched that night! God, please, please, please don't let shits happen on me and my friends that night. I really, really, really want to be there.

The Band

2006-07-04T08:32:00.000+08:00

Angels & Airwave - The Adventure Muse's latest single is a disaster. Well, in my humble opinion. I chatted with this guy through YM 2 days ago and he asked me whether I like Muse (after I told him that I worship Radiohead). We just know each other through Teri. He just broke up. His ex-boyfriend left him for another guy. He's cute. Good. He's in a band. Turned me on. He's Sabahan. God, I want to rape him. Alright, alright, back to the real story. Heh. So, I told him I like Muse too. But after I listened to 'Super Massive Black Hole', I think I like the OLD Muse better. The one that make me glued their badge on my laptop's lid 2 years ago to tell the world that I listen to their great music. I'm really...dejected. They suck big time this round. P/S: Teri, if you read this, shut up.

The Friend

2006-07-02T09:14:00.000+08:00

Radiohead-There There Oh man. I'm so happy today. I just chatted with my friend in Dublin and he told me he got a pair of Radiohead's t-shirt and a cd he promised me!!! Yayyyyy!!! The stupid thing is, he didn't go to the concert! He gave up the tickets to his friends for a good price. Fucker.

The Escape

2006-07-01T09:24:00.000+08:00

Snow Patrol-Chocolate Just got back from PD. Been there for 3 days with 3 straight couples. Yes, I was the only queer there. We had great time. The girls kept their promises not to leave me alone. The guys were awesome. It was a great escape from our hectic life.

The Play

2006-06-10T08:27:00.000+08:00

Bloc Party-Banquet Went to KLPAC to watch 'The Fastest Clock In The Universe' with some friends last night. Missed the first part due to some inevitable circumstances. Shits happened and I don't want to reveal it here. Didn't do any homework before I go to the play and I was shocked to find out that this 120-minute play is about gay life. So my first theatrical experience is a gay play. Cool. Suits me well. We arrived during the 15-minute intervening period where everyone was smiling outside and I know they enjoyed the play. The best parts from the last 60 minutes was when Cougar Glass (Gavin Yap) gave a hand job to Foxtrot Darling (Niki Cheong) and when Sherbet Gravel (Joanna Bessey) had a brawl with Cougar. I love Cheetah Bee's (Faridah Merican) big smile at the end of the play. Really upset that I missed the first part. I'd not hesitate to watch this play again if they reenact it.

The Movie

2006-05-19T18:08:00.000+08:00

Went to OU's GSC to watch The Da Vinci Code with 11 other colleagues. We've been waiting for this movie weeks before. Saw lots of beautiful people there and some I recognised from the Net. Since I've read the book 2 years ago, so it's not that thrill anymore. I think they left some part of the book like the fertility sign and the phi thing. Anyway, I give it 3 out of 5 stars.

The Planes

2006-05-15T10:49:00.000+08:00

The Strokes-Juicebox Went to Sepang yesterday with my crazy friends and these were what we got! Heh.

Personally, I like this one the most. Bold and strong.

Another hunk.

Headless because it was too fast.

Another one.

And another one.

This one looks like a ray to me.

Sexy.

Loud and proud.

Yes, they were really above our heads when we took these. To those pilots who saw us, I'm one of the five idiots on the hill!

The Song

2006-05-03T12:19:00.000+08:00

Third Eye Blind-'Jumper' I know that this is an old song but while I'm listening to Fly FM last night, this DJ told a story behind it. It turned out that this song is about Stephen Jenkins' friend who committed suicide by jumping from a ledge(hence, 'jumper') because he is gay. I tried to look further about this from the Net but failed to find any. Hope anyone who knows the story will share it with me by providing any related links. "Everyone's got to face down the demons"-Jumper

The Dream

2006-04-23T08:21:00.000+08:00

Red Hot Chilli Peppers-Dani California I was a hockey player last night. I was at this training field with all these kids trying to score a goal. It's a one-team game so there's only one goalkeeper. The funny thing is, we played using a puck, just like in ice hockey. While dribbling with this kid, the puck suddenly smashed into pieces, my alarm went off, I woke up and writing this at work.

The Dream

2006-04-22T15:54:00.000+08:00

Suede-Beautiful Ones I don't know why I keep having weird dreams and last night I was at war. Yes. I was a soldier last night surrounded by enemies while hiding in a bunker. I was paired with this guy whom I hardly recognised and we tried to shoot all these enemies. I don't know who are we against to. The strange thing is, my bullets hardly reach the target. They went in slow motion, just like the scene in The Matrix. Can't wait what's coming tonight.

The Dream

2006-04-21T12:45:00.000+08:00

Travis-The Beautiful Occupation I had a dream last night where I had a fight with this guy on a spiral staircase. I ended up jerking out his eyes, leaving one dangling on his face and I used a saw to cut his throat. I think I killed him. Errr...he's cute.

The Musing

2006-04-20T08:32:00.000+08:00

Have you ever thought about the way you die? I know this sounds strange but come on, everyone will die. It's just a matter of time. Personally, I think I'm going to be murdered. I don't know why, but I always had this feeling. Call me crazy but I'm just being realistic.

The Concert

2006-04-16T10:55:00.000+08:00

Though not a big fan of Indonesian rock band, I went to 'Pesta Malam Indonesia' (Indon Fest) yesterday. It was a last-minute decision and it was made under constant insistence by Di who faithfully persuaded me to go with the usual 'The Loft' clique. Which mean, another straight-acting outing. It was only me and the other two cute guys(yes, they are!) who still didn't buy the ticket. The rest bought their discounted tickets(they got the RM80 tickets for RM60) days before. We(me and the two cute guys) were lucky because these friends who worked at the concert gave us the RM80 tickets for only RM50! Heh. Lucky devils. Most of the bands performed really well especially the most-awaited act, Dewa 19. Noted as the 'U2' of the South-East Asia, Dewa 19 drove the mostly-Indon crowd crazy. Though I only know 2 or 3 of their songs, I enjoyed it as much especially their last number 'Laskar Cinta' (Soldier of Love) where the lyric promotes peace and love. And now I know that their drummer is fucking beautiful. Heh.

The drenched ticket and wristband. We were soaked in heavy rain half-way the concert.

The Anxiety

2006-04-14T16:20:00.000+08:00

I went to OU's TGV to watch 'Gubra'(Anxiety) last night and all I can say is, it was damn good that I'm going to watch it again! I think we have enough review on this beautiful movie and I don't think I should jump into the bandwagon. It's only that I want to share my 120-minutes long 'experience' with these two women who sat next to me and keep on commenting along the movie: Woman 1 : "I bet he's going to 'samak'(Muslim cleansing ritual) after this" (upon seeing the muezzin touching a three-legged dog while on his way to the 'surau')

Woman 2: "Mmmmm"

Woman 1: "Eh, he didn't 'samak' lar!" (upon seeing the muezzin calling to prayer without performing 'samak')

Man, wasn't she making a fool of herself?

The Dead Poodle

2006-04-13T14:58:00.000+08:00

This is my poodle, He's no longer here. This is my poodle, He died in fear.

The Voice

2006-04-10T23:17:00.000+08:00

I don't know whether it's really like what we think but my room mate and I heard this voice, a ghost voice around 4 am today! It couldn't be my imagination or I begin to hear voices in my head because my room mate heard it too. It turned out later that one of my housemates saw this figure peeking into the house from the sliding door. I don't know whether to believe it or not but the previous tenant also claimed that he saw this figure too. As long as 'it' didn't harm anyone, I'm alright with it.

The Gadget

2006-04-06T23:10:00.000+08:00

I got the digicam that I bidded from this local online auction site today. Now that I have my own digicam, expect more colours here, soon. Heh.

The Movie

2006-04-03T21:22:00.000+08:00

I finally had the chance to watch 'Capote'. Fucking good movie that I almost curse myself for not watching it earlier. The fact that the main character is gay should not undermine my view and compliment for this movie. I'd still love it even if he's straight. No doubt about it. I let myself listen to a couple of song from 'Doves' and 'Blur' before I write this. Reason? It's just that these British rock things allow me to arrange words in my head, sometimes dragged me to ponder about what I'm going to do with my vulnerable life and often give me ideas of what to write, of what's the right word to put to describe things. I don't know where all these come from but it worked for me. OK, back to 'Capote', Philip Seymour Hoffman really gives an unforgettable performance. He truly deserved the Oscar's Best Actor Award. Now I'm thinking of buying Capote's 'In Cold Blood'...Heh.

The Emo

2006-03-26T18:51:00.000+08:00

Just to add some colour here... heh.

The Book

2006-03-21T23:16:00.000+08:00

I got myself a book titled 'Fag Hag' by Robert Rodi from Borders today. I'm still on it and the story is hilarious. Almost can't put it down.

The Break

2006-03-14T22:29:00.000+08:00

Yon and I went to work as usual this morning when suddenly we didn't feel well and decided to take medical leave. Obviously, we need to take 1-day break after that long journey. To kill the time, I bought this DVD titled 'Dorian Blues'. Not bad and it turned out that the movie had won a number of awards. Go figure.

The Summary

2006-03-14T21:55:00.000+08:00

Awesome!. It's totally awesome!. The road trip to Kelantan ended up with a road trip to east-coast states. Can't say how happy I am, thanks to Ab, her family and friends who treated us(Yon & me) with superb hospitality. Like the title suggest, below are the summarised events of our road trip: Day 1

Arrived at Pantai Irama, Bachok after 8-hour long journey from PJ. Beautiful beach. Had our lunch at Restaurant Pak Ya. It's just at the beach's main entrance. They served very delicious local cuisines at unbelievably low price. Really. Strictly recommended.
Went straight to Kota Bharu and later that night to Wakaf Che Yeh where they have this abundance of 'bundle' shoes, t- shirts , fruits and local cuisines. Got myself a pair of K.Swiss shoes. Heh.

Day 2

Went to Pasar Besar Siti Khatijah after breakfast. Got myself a few packets of 'keropok' to bring back.
Went to MPKB, Bazar Buluh Kubu, Istana Jahar and Bulatan Merdeka.
Went to Rantau Panjang and got myself this medium-sized, Siamese-style futon.

Day 3

Went to Pantai Sri Tujuh for breakfast.
Went to Pengkalan Kubor and stopped at Kg. Jambu where they have this huge 'Sleeping Buddha'. Went to Rantau Panjang(again!).
Went to Ab's friend's wedding where I saw these 2 cute Japanese guys! Don't have their pictures though...
Went to Pantai Cahaya Bulan in the evening.

Day 4

Headed back to PJ. Crossing Trengganu using the route heads southward passing through beautiful beaches. Stopped at Kg. Losong, Kuala Trengganu to bring back some 'kepok lekor'. Stopped at Pantai Batu Burok.
Fascinated by its charmness, we surprised ourselves by stopping at Pantai Cherating and dived in! Fucking beautiful beach! Ended up almost 3 hours there! We even promised to come back.
Continued our journey using Karak Highway. Arrived in PJ after 16-hour long journey!

The Survey

2006-03-08T08:15:00.000+08:00

Describe yourself using one band and song titles from that band
Choose a band/artist and answer only in song TITLES by that band::	Radiohead
Are you male or female::	Paranoid Android
Describe yourself::	High And Dry
How do some people feel about you::	Creep
How do you feel about yourself::	Packt Like Sardines In A Crushd Tin Box
Describe your ex girlfriend/boyfriend::	Life In A Glass House
Describe your current girlfriend/boyfriend::	No Surprises
Describe where you want to be::	Sail To The Moon
Describe what you want to be::	Karma Police
Describe how you live::	Climbing Up The Walls
Describe how you love::	Like Spinning Plates
Share a few words of wisdom:	Anyone Can Play Guitar
Take this survey Find more surveys You've been totally Bzoink*d

The Road Trip

2006-03-07T16:13:00.000+08:00

The trip to Kelantan was conceived a month ago. It was Ab's idea since she wants to go back to her hometown in Pasir Mas. Yon and I decided to follow her since we have never been there before. Yes, we have never been to Kelantan before! What a shame. Heh. We're going to stay at Ab's house for four days starting this Thursday. We're really excited about this thinking that we'll be away for a while from the hectic urban life.....and crazy customers!

The Customer

2006-03-06T22:15:00.000+08:00

I received a call from this ludicrous customer who asked me about something that my 12-year old sister can think of: Customer: Hi, I don't have the hole to put my phone socket. (What he meant is the port behind his CPU) Me: The hole to put your phone socket? Customer: Yes, the hole behind the CPU. What do you think I should do? Me: I'm sorry sir, I can't do much about it. You have to refer your pc vendor. (What I meant is "Do you think I was paid to answer your silly question? Do you want me to poke the hole from here?" ) Customer: OK, alright. I really need a break.

The Arbitrator

2006-03-05T20:37:00.000+08:00

Zade called and asked me what happened between J and me. I know that Zade will call me to talk about this. Being older and wise, he's the one who'll settle all the disputes occured between J and me. Zade: Where are you now? Me: I'm in KJ. Zade: What's going on? Me: Well, things happened. Zade: Why? Me: Didn't he tell you about this? Zade: Do you still love him? Me: No. Zade: Why? Me: I just don't. Zade: But why? Me: I have many problems right now. Zade: I'll call you back later. And I hope he won't because I'm not in the mood to talk about this(though I told everything to Yon because she's the first person I would go to when my head is asphyxiated with shits) love-hate relationship. It's over and I admit that it's my fault. I want this. I appreciate Zade's efforts(past and present) to reconcile things but this time, allow me to make my own decision. It's not easy and it's not overnight. I've been thinking, rethinking, considering, reconsidering the good and bad things out of this decision. Obviously, someone will hurt and it's inevitable. I'm sure J will get through this considering that he has had several failed relationships before and he, I think, used to it. This is my first relationship(I wouldn't call it love because it's just not) and I believe, I'll get through this. I may sound like one selfish-tough guy who has no heart but I know what I'm doing. At least, I'm not faking. At least, I'm not lying to him......and myself.

The End

2006-03-05T14:37:00.000+08:00

While I was preparing to take my shower, I received a message from J: J: I dont know what is our status now. I'm at Zade's now. I'm going back tonight. If you come, means we're still an item. If not, then so be it. I don't know what to say. Me: I think we are not an item anymore. But I hope we don't become enemies. Let's settle this maturely. Let's not fight. It's not your fault. It's mine. I've been thinking that I'm not giving you any good. I'm not good enough for you. You deserved better. We are still friends right? J: But I love you. Me: You loved a wrong guy. You deserved better than me. Believe me. J: Or you have someone else? Me: Honestly, I don't. I'm not the kind that left someone for another guy and I'm not the kind that can easily get another guy. J: Please come to Zade's. I'm going back tonight. Me: I'm sorry I can't. J: Please see me at Zade's. We didn't know when are we going to see each other again. I'm going to be busy. For the last time, please fulfill my request. You are the one who said we should end this maturely. Me: We'll see each other again but not today. J: Please, I want to have sex with you for the last time as a couple. I want you to fuck me like you always want. Me: I'm sorry I can't. It's not right.

The Cancelled Plan

2006-03-04T22:35:00.000+08:00

The planned jamming is cancelled since the so-called 'vocalist' is absent. Ended up spending the whole day staying at home. Bought 'Munich' DVD to kill the time.

The Deception

2006-03-03T21:32:00.000+08:00

We've been duped! Big time! The job agency that we put our trusts on deceited us by silently shrinking our wages! I was undergoing another training today (which is carefully embedded under their scam scheme) when a group of my colleagues gathered among themselves talking about our latest confusing payslips. They tried to seek explanations from the job agency's staff who's placed in the HR department but I've been told that she walked off after knowing that we're going after her. Attempts to contact her through her handphone failed. She switched off her phone! One scared bitch, ain't she? Some of us had the chance to talk to one of the HR people and she told them that she's going to make things clear next Monday. Some of us even decided not to take calls today. Typical response from disgruntled labors. One of the senior colleague showed me a copy of the agency's salary guide and I found out that we were getting less than we deserved. Amazed, I made another few copies and distributed it among my colleagues and resulting to numerous reaction. How should I put it......yes, hysterical and dejected! Hysterical that we've been deceived en masse and dejected that we know we deserved better than we get. My life is getting funnier. Heh. Thank you for calling TMNet, have a nice day!

The Dream

2006-03-01T17:18:00.000+08:00

I had this dream last night where the tip of one of my drumsticks is broken before I start the jamming session. Wonder what's that mean...

The Hike

2006-02-28T23:43:00.000+08:00

Fall Out Boy-Dance, Dance The oil price has gone up again and I'm not surprised to see other goods to follow suit. Working class people like me will be fucked up big time. Thanks to your votes for the current government. So what's next? Mass retrenchment?